I've heard rave reviews about this movie and finally decided to check it out. I've heard about it but didn't really know to much about it. Decided to watch it tonight and it was your typical American slasher film. It wasn't bad halfway through except the killing parts just looked way to cheesy to me. And every girl crying in scenes just ruins it and it's annoying. The ending was even worse. Somehow he was stabbed through the chest and seemed "dead" and they left and went in a boat. But then he comes back in the water and grabs the girl? Doesn't make any sense. Don't know how'd he get there so fast. Then a little bit after he was in the boat and killed the one guy. Just made no sense at all. Didn't really scare me. But it does say comedy on there. I see no need for them to have made a second one.

I generally love horror movies and tend to be biased in grading them, but I'm telling you to skip this one. This movie starts off with two guys in a boat. They see an alligator and we cut to a group of friends and a Debbie Downer, or David Downer in this case. Apparently his best friend, the token black guy, is trying to take him to Mardi Gras to cheer him up. Anyway, the movie continues when he walks away and his best friend follows him. Main guy complains that seeing the women, topless, just remind him of his attractive girlfriend who left him for a jock. I can't imagine why she left you. He drags his friend to a weird horror shop and Candy Man makes an appearance. They leave the shop because he's close and go to another tour guide place, with an Asian tour guide, and see a director and two random girls making an adult film. Didn't main guy just complain about shirtless girls? Now he doesn't care? They meet the tour guide and join the other tourists: an old couple and a random girl. Best friend is enamored with the brunette film star and they spend the ride flirting. Main guy likes random girl, but she tells him to screw off.Tour guide is obviously full of crap, but they decide to go on a tour with him anyway. When they get on the boat they hear a guy shouting at them not to go. The guide ignores him saying that he's just a random guy who drinks his own pee. They speed off, and the movie shows the guy drinking his own pee. It's not funny, it's nasty, and was not needed. They crash into a rock and get off onto nearby land. As they do that, old man gets his foot bitten off by an alligator.Later, best friend and tour guide asks random girl why she even brought a gun on the tour in the first place and she says that she won't answer a con artist. He admits that he's just looking to make money, and explains that he's done a tour before and it went okay. Tour guide asks again and she answers "my dad and brother were killed, so I got on the tour to find them. It's cheaper than getting my own boat." Blonde film star says it doesn't explain the gun, and random girl replies that the woods aren't safe. Old woman reminds them that her husband needs help. Group ponders staying, because they can't move him around too much, but random girl says they can't stay in the woods because these are "his" woods.She then tells them a story about a guy and his deformed son (elephant man). Elephant man got made fun of by local children. He ended up dying because local teenagers were trying to see him, so they threw fireworks inside his house causing it to catch fire. The dad came home to open the door, but it wouldn't budge, so he used a hatchet; he accidentally kills his son and died of a broken house.After the story, everyone is freaking out and wanting to know what to do. Some suggest they stay there and wait for help, but the random girl says that they can't because they're right in front of his haunted house. She says the road is behind the house, and the blonde girl says she doesn't want to go that way. The old couple decide to go that way to look for some help, and they discover a house (Elephant man's house), and Elephant man comes out to get them. The random girl pulls out a gun and waits until Elephant man kills them both before she decides to shoot him. Really? The group freaks out because random girl told them that he was a ghost, and you shouldn't be able to shoot a ghost. In the midst of this, best friend has climbed a tree and says he sees city lights, but they're pretty far away. The brunette asks where the director is, and we (audience) see him running and Elephant man kills him. Answers that question. The group keeps going before best friend sparks an argument with tour guide, and they start fist fighting. Um? I'm pretty sure y'all don't have time to be fist fighting. Group finds the directors bag and find out he's not a director, he's just a sick guy making films for his own amusement. They later find his body and mourn over him for a short time. I'm just going to keep the rest short. They all run around and the Elephant man kills the tour guide and brunette. They plan to set him on fire and he kills the blond. The remaining three run off and the best friend ends up dying. The main guy and girl get on a boat, she gets drug under water and he reaches for her. Dude, you've only known her for less than a day to be risking your life like that. The monster comes back and attacks them, the end. No, it actually ends that way.Everything is just terrible. The plot makes no sense, the person with the best weapon sucks, and the ending was chopped up. The characters are terrible. The old couple are boring background characters that were upgraded in this movie. The best friend is the trope of the token black guy. The tour guide is just a con artist. The rest are just plain bad. The main guy and his love interest manage to be worse than a freaking con artist, and that's pretty bad considering that the movie WANTS us to hate the con artist.

i watched this movie years ago, and it was one of the only movies i wouldn't read reviews on before i watched... randomly came across them recently... I've only read like the 10 most recent reviews of this movie and they honestly just annoy me. first of all... why years after this movie was made, let everyone know that because of all the hype you decided to watch it...?anyone expecting Hatchet to be anything more than just straight up ridiculous gory fun is a complete idiot. Green himself doesn't understand why it was depicted as the next era of horror, or an homage to old school slashers. a director who enjoys horror movies to the fullest, came up with an entire new serial killer, with a very classic background story, wrote a hilarious script filled with horror stereotypes and clichés, and just buckets and buckets of blood... what more could you ask for? what more could you want?how about everyone just calm down. sit back. and just give it a chance. i thoroughly enjoyed hatchet, and both sequels.(there are a few icons in this movie, do you think they would be in it for no reason?)

I'm writing this review after a second viewing of Hatchet. I do love a good/daft horror/slasher movie and this one was billed as being right up there with the best of them, plus even a homage to the classics of the seventies and eighties.In short, I didn't like it at first. However, after a couple of years I decided to watch it again and see if I missed anything.Even now, I probably wouldn't say it's an absolute classic, but it is a decent enough little yarn (with plenty of blood).Did I say 'plenty' of blood? I meant TONNES. In fact, the producers obviously know they're going a bit over the top and must have had great fun throwing bucketloads of the red stuff at trees after every kill takes place.It's quite a short film (it doesn't really need to be any longer) and, after the thumping Marilyn Manson opening song, we meet about a group of people who go on a boat ride into the swamps of America and end up on the wrong end of a maniac's hatchet. The kills are very violent and, if you're looking for gore, you'll find it here. The best part of the film is the characters. Whether they're horrible or nice, they're entertaining. There's plenty of amusing banter between them to keep us amused (special mention to the two *ahem* 'actresses' who continually bicker with each other all the way through).These good characters go some way to make up for the film's major flaw: they don't kill the killer. This slasher film possibly has the most opportunities to either kill, or severely subdue the nutter with the hatchet, yet they choose to run off every time and leave him to 'get better' and resume coming after them. This is the most annoying part of the film and, if it wasn't for the snappy, tongue-in-cheek dialogue, I would have found myself getting increasingly annoyed with the whole package.All in all, this film is far from perfect, but, if you lower your expectations enough and put your brain on hold, you should enjoy the daftness and gore (like I say, it's not on for long!).Also, kudos to the film-makers for getting Robert Englund, Kane Hodder and Tony Todd on the same cast list.