Did this movie even happen? Or was it a delirious, hallucinogenic fever dream? It's hard to tell the difference sometimes. Puss in Boots is sweetness personified, but it's so abrasively shoddy and weird that, watching it, it's easy to worry that you're lapsing out of consciousness and sobriety, much like the superimposed shapeshifting ogre and cat who flicker in front of our eyes like oh so many acid flashbacks. The film is kind of winningly adorable - but in the same way that any train wreck would be adorable if hundreds of kittens sauntered out of the derailed caboose. It's quaintly antiquated, insofar as no self-respecting recent release, even straight-to-DVD ones, would produce a finished product passing itself as a film so wooden, clumsy, and cheap looking (the community centre called - they'd like their cardboard sets and discount Halloween store costumes back, please and thank you. Okay, that was mean. See?! This movie is too cute to properly mock!). Everything is so gloriously stiff that it recalls a Coen Brothers parody, yet its bare-faced earnest wholesomeness grants it a transcendent level of camp hilarity. We can forgive the lurching storyline due to the children's source material. But the snoozy pace, stretching out and plodding along between Puss' machinations to elevate his master from lowly farm hand to sleight-of-hand royalty, is more bedtime story than nursery rhyme. The musical numbers are so painfully bland and still, that I, at one point, started counting the threads on my couch as I telepathically implored the characters to stop, so I could stop nervously cringe-laughing at them. Meanwhile, the cast performing them - so amateurish one practically wants to hand out participation medals - over or under-act with the wanton inconsistency of a grade school pantomime. Jason Connery (yes, son of THAT Connery) in particular is so outrageously comatose that he practically sets a new low of what has been recorded constituting a performance - toddlers reading story books out low would demonstrate more inflection.So why the three stars? Three guesses (and the first two don't count). Christopher Walken. He's iconic in the industry for his unique ability to be unbelievably good in unbelievably bad work, and he's never put his talents to such use as he does here. His flamboyant, gallant charisma and flawless song and dance skills bring effervescent life to literature's most famous trickster cat, while his uniquely syncopated delivery makes every line he speaks garrulously hilarious (whether it's always intentional is up for discussion). Even his springy, fidgety physicality uncannily embodies feline twitchiness. Cheerily oblivious to the disaster he's surrounded by, he's clearly having such a ball that it's hard not to share in his fun, and it's solely because of him that the film deserves even a whisper of recognition henceforth. Puss in Boots is inarguably awful, but it's so gosh-darn likable that taking pot shots at it is the guiltiest kind of derision. Walken works his Walken magic like never before, bounding around in a pirate hat and capturing our hearts. His delightful weirdness is what helps transform this cheap mess into the surreal, camp masterpiece it was destined to be. Still, even the youngest, most forgiving of audiences are likely to dismiss Puss in Boots as distressingly boring, weird, hokey trash. Mee-ouch. -3/10

Although none of the nine Cannon Movie Tale films are flawless, with the flaws varying in number and size, all of them are worth a viewing at least once. And while Puss in Boots is one of their lesser outings (with the weakest being The Emperor's New Clothes, and their best being Hansel and Gretel and Beauty and the Beast), it's not an exception.The best thing about Puss in Boots is the performance of Christopher Walken as Puss, the singing is not the best but he clearly looks as though he's having a whale of a time here and he is so much fun to watch, performing with sly line delivery, a wonderful twitchiness (which is quite appropriate for a cat), fearless bravado and absolutely no signs of being embarrassed either. Carmela Marner is a charming Princess Vera, and has a truly infectious smile, while Yossi Graber is entertainingly buffoonish as the King without resorting to mugging too much. The dialogue does descend into over-silliness sometimes, but is witty and genuinely hilarious, so it would be a lie if I said that I wasn't entertained. The film is nicely photographed, the sets are nice and rustic if somewhat recycled of other Cannon films and the incidental score has the right amount of energy and whimsy.Puss in Boots has several major problems though. For one thing, apart from the photography and the sets the low budget does show and it is generally one of Cannon's cheaper looking films. Some parts are dimly or gaudily lit and the costumes are garish and seldom flattering, looking like leftover material, but worst of all were the very cheap and out-of-date-looking (even for a film from the 80s) special effects (the Cannon film that fares the worst in this regard), especially the cat transformation and the under-sized ogre. While the incidental score is good, Puss in Boots does boast one of Cannon's weakest song scores, with only those for The Emperor's New Clothes being worse. The songs here are forgettable at best, some also go on for too long- feeling more like padding than anything else- and some of the lyrics are so dreadfully silly that they're enough to make one cringe, like the rhyming lyrics in the song offering marriage advice.With the story, the basic details and characters are here but they didn't feel quite enough to sustain a feature length film, padding it out with forgettable and sometimes overlong songs and scenes that got too silly (i.e. the ineptitude of the guards), the silliness while entertaining did get too much at times and undermined the darker moments like the scene with Puss and the ogre. With the rest of the performances, most of the rest of the supporting turns mug pretty embarrassingly, the ogre is more unintentionally comical than sinister (coupled with his underwhelming look, he was one disappointing villain) but worst of all was Jason Connery who spends the entire running time looking hopelessly bland and dim-witted and devoid of any charm, his and Marner's chemistry is dull while his and Walken's only just about passes muster because Walken does such a great job here.All in all, one of Cannon's weakest films but is still watchable for Walken's performance. 5/10 Bethany Cox

look.not a great work of cinema. no one would be that insane or naive enough to make a claim about something like this. but like all Cannon MovieTales, this production works out happily ever after. it does everything nicely and efficiently, and even though it doesn't leave the viewer with much, it attempts consummate professionalism with modest means. and succeeds very well.the best thing about this is Cristopher Walken of course. i'm always impressed at how Cannon was always able to obtain big name actors for their modest direct to video productions. i always kind of think it was the promise of the singing and dancing because the paycheck couldn't have been that impressive. whatever the reason, the celeb names are always engaging in these movies and Walken is especially good here. and eerily feline like as puss. he's also good at dance and song which he rarely does outside of Fatboy Slim music videos.the youthful leads are also cute and nice to watch. even though they don't do there own singing, their wholesome appeal rivals anything in a high school musical show.the songs aren't memorable but they definitely are functional and it's surprising a modest production like this even has a original score in the first place.even though there isn't a lot of high tech CGI FX, due to the fact that these movies were made in the eighties prior to the current technology, they still hold up well. and Cannon offers two attributes no one else is currently offering in fairy tales outside of Disney right now, the films are impeccably wholesome and safe entertainment for families, and they are usually musical tellings. that sets them aside as a little more original then some of the recent, trendier tellings marketed today.i really love Cannon MovieTales and i love what they offer. it is special and unique, and that keeps them timeless.

Although this was obviously a low-budget production, the performances and the songs in this movie are worth seeing. One of Walken's few musical roles to date. (he is a marvelous dancer and singer and he demonstrates his acrobatic skills as well - watch for the cartwheel!) Also starring Jason Connery. A great children's story and very likable characters.