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A Greek History Professor & his daughter travel to a Greek Island for one last chance to finish his thesis on ancient love spells before he loses his research grant. His daughter attempts to match her father with the local women without success until she meets a beautiful Mermaid with whose help the Professor might finally find true love for himself.

Billy Zane as  Thomas Bradley
Kelly Brook as  Neried
Alki David as  Captain Mavros
Olivia Grant as  Angela
John Nettleton as  Professor Coulter
Terrence Hardiman as  Professor Ratcher

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Reviews

Dr_Mark_ODoherty
2008/05/01

Although the plot is somewhat predictable, this is actually a very original comedy with some gutsy and very funny performances - especially from the strong supporting cast, that includes a very diverse range of actors. A spirited performance also by Kelly Brook. Her transformation from the haughty, dignified mermaid goddess into the whimpering lovesick fool - who stalks her love interest by camouflaging herself with a bush - is very funny. In fact, this modern Greek love tale would have been almost touching, if it would not have been so chaotic and comical.

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shinybutton
2008/05/02

This film was a massive disappointment. The set up is fine, but the mermaid turns out to have a spoiled brat nature that ruins the magic. The plot is chaotic and the characters seem fickle, if not just mentally ill. They weirdly insert a menacing cross-dressing shop keeper into the middle of the film, for no apparent purpose to the plot. The villain fisherman is also a peeping tom who gets his jollies spying on women in their underwear. The village matchmaker attempts to lure the Dad, by tossing a bucket of water on buxom village women. Then at the end, an old man suddenly falls in love with his male colleague and kisses him! I know there are parents out there that will not be expecting all of this, this or wanting to venture into the questions that may arise from it.

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NeliaQ
2008/05/03

It is entertaining, yes, comic, made me giggle a few times. And the mermaid actress, Kelly Brook, is dead gorgeous. Her tale is a magnificent prop. And that is about it. This accounts for the two stars.None of the characters makes any sense. They are all collages of different personalities. And with them, the plot keeps flipping randomly as well.Amber Savva, the little girl, is such a bad actress it is annoying. Her character is a good swimmer, and yet makes no attempt at all to rescue her drowning father. She has a security-blanket bracelet she fondles with constantly in the beginning, but she doesn't notice it is lost till half a day has passed. There is a visible attempt to make her pass for a mature girl, but all the inconsistencies flunk this.Her father is such a confused and weak-willed fellow I don't know how he survived high-school, let alone become a professor near an intellectual break-through.This old Greek servant, if she doesn't live in the house, why was she there one time at night? Why don't people leave their clothes and wallets on a safe place at the beach instead of practically under the waves? This book on the mermaids is said to be really really very old, and yet there are Art Nouveau paintings on the pages. And etc.There is a strong hint that the mermaid is the lost daughter of the elderly professor, and that he knew of mermaids and had mated with one, and yet, nothing comes of it. There is a strong hint that the bad fisherman (played by the director Alki David himself) drowns and his good son will be adopted by the heroes, but no either. There is claim on the tail's jewels, and yet we hardly see them. There is no reason for a special breathing shell for swimming underwater if the wonder-cave is a few meters from shore and above water level. And etc.With all these reality flaws, I seriously doubt there is any fundamental truth or logic in the professor's studies on the Classical Greek spells and poems. I mean, the actors don't even look in the correct direction at times...!It is sad: the story could have been really pretty, but the characters and the plot were so ill-developed you can't but wonder which fourth-grader took over David's mind....I have just noticed: the movie is from 2007! Fancy that? I thought it was some twenty years old. Mr. David, get your story straight, and film it again properly. It will make a lovely movie.

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Der_Schnibbler
2008/05/04

The cast may have seemed to have had fun filming this--but you certainly won't.Classicist goes to Greek island with his daughter to work on his research on ancient love spells. There his daughter befriends a mermaid, with whom she subsequently attempts to fix up her reclusive and work-obsessed father.Sounds good when I put it that way but sitting through the film is a very different experience. If I had to describe this entire movie in one word, it would be "jagged." The plot lurches abruptly in random directions, with characters' motivations suddenly shifting unexplainably or we see them performing actions which are bizarre and out of place.Not long after the professor arrives on the island, he calls Oxford and, in a drunken stupor, tells them he quits his job. There is no lead up to this. Nothing. Out of nowhere, a perfectly composed researcher is shown drunk and quitting. His daughter, who befriends the mermaid, does all she can to make her father and the mermaid meet only to suddenly change her mind because she realizes her father is in love with "a fish." Why is the daughter's motivation suddenly twisted around 180 degrees? In another scene, we see the daughter walking into a shop and addressed by a female shopkeeper with a dubbed male voice who snorts, pig-like. Why? We will never know. The villain is played by a local fisherman with a mechanical arm (your guess it as good as mine here) who wants to capture the mermaid for his own profit.Countless of scenes consist of snippets of dialog which seem to have belonged in a bigger conversation. Then the scene cuts to yet another in a long stream of bizarre happenings.I don't want to put this film down, because I rather like its strange but original nature. However, I must warn any potential viewers: If you are looking for an off-beat, strange little movie that'll slightly perplex you while it throws in a few slightly amusing parts, then sure, go see "Fishtales." However, if you are looking to be ENTERTAINED--if you want a movie with a coherent plot, which is well-paced, moves in a pleasant manner and captures you attention without you having to constantly pause and ask yourself, "what the..."--see "Splash" instead.

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