Do you get it? Like the car. These are the jokes, folks. Softcore Beach Blanket Bingo with aliens answers many of life's important question. What do the relatives of celebrities do for some cash? How does a hot tan alien wash herself? How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, maybe not that one. Linnea Quigley, member of the Softcore hall of fame, provides some comic relief. Nikki Fritz, also a member, show her talents. Sarah Bellomo is not as bad as you might expect from a porn star. This is not erotic, except the shower scene, and not funny enough to make up for the rotten plot. The sequel has a couple of pleasant scenes as well with Miss Bellomo.P.S. The title is a good example of alliteration.

Back in the early 90's, when the world of "Skinemax" was just beginning and most of the films back then either starred Shannon Whirry or Shannon Tweed, there was a little sub-genre of the B-movie experience called the "bikini movie." This film, "Beach Babes From Beyond", falls into that category. There were so many "bikini" films made during that period, it was unreal....they single-handedly kept "USA Up All Night" on the air and kept Gilbert Gottfried and Rhonda Shear gainfully employed.The premise of this movie is simple: take three intergalactic space babes, supposedly on a shopping spree with Daddy's spaceship and Daddy's money, and crash-land them on the sunny beaches of California. That should be it right there....the rest of the movie should deal with them attempting to have sex with as many surfer dudes as possible and go home happily satisfied. Instead, we get a variation of STSWB, or "Save The Something With Breasts." A simple plot device, actually. In order to save a (carwash/hotel/drive-in/old decrepit house) from (destruction/a buy-out/foreclosure/an evil relative), a group of girls get in bikinis and try to raise a certain amount of cash in a very short time. It's a tried and true formula that works every time.The girls offer to enter a bikini contest in order to raise the money. We need an antagonist, so enter Linnea Quigley, a B-movie legend, to send her legion of bikini-clad models in to win the prize. We know how it ends (the good guys always win, you know), so let's not dwell on it.I had to pop in the tape of this film again to make sure I gave it the correct grade, and fortunately I did. Here's your chance to see Nikki Fritz before she became a soft-core film staple, and the cast is littered with the relatives of actual A-list actors. I guess riding coattails wasn't enough for these folks, they actually want to work for a living!This film comes in way behind "The Bikini Carwash Company" in the "bikini film" category. In my opinion, "Bikini Summer 3" is barely (and I do mean BARELY) better than this movie, and that's not saying much.Women: C (The women were okay, nothing spectacular. They looked like I could walk down the street and probably bump into one of them. In films like these, that ain't good.)Sex: D (Sex? If you call hugging gently while naked, but no actual movement going on "sex", then go right ahead--but I won't.)Story: D+ (STSWB movies don't do well with me unless there's a whole lot of slapstick comedy, as there was in "Bikini Carwash Company.")Overall: C- (Barely a passing grade, saved from failure by Linnea Quigley's funny character, the only one with any real development. Don't get me started on old "Uncle Bud." His "aging hippie/surfer dude" character is too one-dimensional.)In short, if you're channel flipping and happen to stop on it randomly, then watch it. If not, it's okay....you won't be missing much.

This was a great movie! It was a completely enjoyable adolescent fantasy. So what makes a movie great? Technical details? I think that if that were the sole criteria, our culture would be the poorer for it. So this movie is to "The Godfather" as new wave music is to Mozart. The point is, it is one of the best movies of it's type I've seen. The women are all beautiful (as are only seen on California beaches when movies are being made). It has a little of everything, a kind of battlestar gallactica meets baywatch meets the playboy centerfold video meets Wayne's World. There is plenty of charm and a reasonable (albeit predictable) storyline that keeps you interested until the next bit of eye candy graces the screen. Joe Estevez may not have his brothers career, but does a good job of bringing focus to the story as the eternally adolescent Uncle Bud. Contains plenty of expected absurdities such as female rock band playing without the guitars plugged in. (Was that intentional?) If you're attracted to the box, rent the video, you won't regret it. As is promised, it is good non-violent erotic fun!

Is this a bad movie?Of course, what were you expecting from a movie called "BEACH BABES FROM BEYOND"?It is a "BABES in BIKINI" movie and has no pretensions of being otherwise. Given, this is not "A ROOM WITH A VIEW" or "SCHINDLER'S LIST." If you wanted a film like "A Room With a View" then you would not be looking at Beach Babes from Beyond. But if you are looking for a good Babes in Bikini movie with almost no plot, this is the one for you. This flick delivers on what it promises and then some. It is pure 100% adolescent fun. There were lots of BABES in and out of bikinis. The movie was quite funny and great to watch. These were some of the most beautiful women I have ever seen on home video.Every high school kid should watch at least one bad movie like this. This is actually one of the most memorable movies I have ever seen. So unashamedly, I say again...If you are going to watch only one "Babes in Bikini" movie, this is it.