No budget cinematic oddities such as "Blood Freak" are truly things to be treasured. You just don't see their like anymore. Only during this time in film history could one see a movie with a plot this trippy and this offbeat. As it's been said many times before, it can boast the distinction of mixing a pro-Christianity, anti-drug message with a tried and true horror movie premise of a monster on the loose and a generous dose of very tacky gore. And throughout this things' 80 minute run time, the co-director Brad Grinter (who'd directed Veronica Lake in her final film, "Flesh Feast") pops up on screen, cigarette in hand, to wax philosophical on the nature of fate and the importance of catalysts.Beefy non-actor Steve Hawkes - who was the other director of this epic - stars as Herschell, a Vietnam veteran / biker who makes the acquaintance of "good girl" Angel (Heather Hughes), a sexy but deeply religious gal. They go to a party where he meets her "bad girl" sister Ann (Dana Cullivan), who helps to get him drugs; in record time he's an addict. Meanwhile, he gets a job at a poultry farm where, among other things, he agrees to function as test subject and eat turkey that's been treated with an experimental drug. The effect? He turns into a shambling, gobbling, mutant turkey man with an enormous papier-mache turkey head. On top of that, he now drinks blood, which he obtains from the necks of various unlucky junkies.A deadly slow pace prevents this from being completely effective, but overall "Blood Freak" is the kind of thing a cult movie lover will want to have the experience of viewing. The audience must be patient, but fortunately this kicks into gear in its second half once Turkey Man is unleashed. Peoples' reactions to Turkey Man are pretty priceless, and Anns' dialogue is delicious, especially when she wonders what the children of her and Herschell would look like. The ladies in this are foxy, the rock score is groovy, and the very clunky nature of "Blood Freak" is endearing overall. One hilarious highlight comes when Turkey Man uses a buzz saw to sever a pushers' leg, and the guy howls in pain for almost a full minute. Grinter adds to the fun when he has a small coughing fit.A true curio, and worth watching for adventurous people.Seven out of 10.

I'm giving this movie an 8 out of ten because I find it very entertaining. However, anyone thinking about watching it should know it is a terrible movie, very low-budget and amateurish. I happen to be a fan of movies that are so bad they're good, and this was the one that got me into them.I happened to see this movie for the first time on Thanksgiving night, 2001. I was living in the Detroit area, and a local horror host called The Ghoul happened to be showing it that night. I was flipping channels while over at a friend's house, and we were doing something else, not really paying attention. However, the longer the movie went on, the more difficult it became to look away. I was transfixed by the absurdity. I had watched campy movies before, but something was different about this one. Something about the atmosphere it created, the unusual characters, and the ridiculous dialog and situations.I eventually ended up buying on the Something Weird DVD, loaded with TONS of great extras. Now, I am interested in finding more movies like it. Because of Blood Freak, I have discovered many other movies that may seem unwatchable, but are actually a lot more fun than the slick, predictable formula that makes it to the theater. I think that my love for movies was broadened as a result.I realize this is more of a personal memoir than a movie review, but that is mainly what I use this site for. It helps me keep track of the movies I've seen and what I thought about them at the time.

Total "Suds & Buds" flick! How's that, you ask? It's a term I use for movies that are best appreciated with a couple brews and... some friends (what kind of "Buds" did ya think I was reefer, oh, excuse me... I meant, "referring" to?). That's not to say this movie couldn't be enjoyed without such things, it just adds to the fun. Now, let's make one thing clear right off the bat, this is not what one would call a good movie. This is CULT. If bad acting, shoddy directing, awful effects and the usual stuff that comes with this fare doesn't immediately turn you off, then tune in, turn on and drop to the floor in fits of laughter! If you're the type to take a movie like this too seriously (or serious at all) then keep walking Jack, cause you're not gonna dig it in the least.Soooo, here we go! Things start with a burly biker named Herschell (who looks like the love child of Elvis Presley and Conway Twitty) riding down the highway and happening upon a girl (named Angel... subtle) having car problems. He gives her a lift to her sister's place and they walk in on a super swinging 70's drug party. Angel's sister, Ann, gets the instant sweats for Herschell but, he's diggin' on Angel. So what does Ann do? Decides to turn him on to weed (yeah, the hard stuff). The problem is, Hersch doesn't get down like that. So Ann plays the old "You're a coward" card and the only thing Herschell hates more than drugs is being thought a coward, so it's puff, puff, pass! Dude, don't ya think it's kinda cowardly to let someone bamboozle you into doing something you don't want to do? Well, he lays Ann afterward, so it's all good.Angel hooks him up with a job at a turkey farm were it appears he doesn't have much to do but throw turkeys from one cage to another. But, mystery lurks within the confines of this farm. Chief among them is some weird experiments being performed by the 2 most awesomest scientists EVER, Lenny and Gene! I mean, Gene looks genuinely scared to be on camera. Lenny's not much better but, Gene kills me! He stutters and looks shook as hell whenever the camera is on him. They offer him a bunch of pot if he'll take part in their experiments (oh yeah, it might help to point out that after one joint, Herschell became a total junkie for the Devil's Weed). I've seen this movie a whole bunch of times and I'm still not sure what the hell these experiments are or what they're supposed to do to enhance the already pleasurable experience of eating turkey (unless you're a vegetarian). So, he agrees and starts pounding down tainted turkey like it's the last meal he'll ever eat (no doubt aided by a super case of the munchies).Would you like to guess what happens next? That's right, he turns into a Tukey-monster with an insane lust for the blood of addicts! Or rather, a guy in a f'd up papier-mache turkey head with an insane lust for red paint that comes shootin' outta poorly placed squibs. Turkey-Hersch goes about his bloody business picking off other junkies (and one old man who didn't appear to be any threat to him). Finally, a couple of Ann's friends (who look like roadies for Grand Funk Railroad) catch up to him and give him a hair cut with a big blade, real close to the shoulders like, which is inter-cut with a scene of a real turkey getting it's head cut off (charming). Why? Got me. I'm guessin' it was an affordable piece of shock value footage.At this point, Herschell wakes up in the woods and realizes it was all a hallucination (natch). He's found by the old dude that runs the turkey farm (who is named Tom... clever) and he calls Angel. She gets Herschell to beg forgiveness from God, just to drive the point home. Through his newfound understandings of His teachings, Hersch forgives Ann and a happy endings enjoyed by all.... well, except for that headless turkey.Sounds great, huh? Well, I didn't even mention the best part yet... the narrator! This joker pops up once in awhile to do a little bible thumpin' and preach the evils of drugs, all the while, puffing on a cigarette. At one point (and I'm not sure this wasn't some sorta put-on) he suffers a coughing fit... I mean,on camera.... and nobody yells "CUT!"..... and it wasn't even edited out after filming! AWE-freakin-SOME! Not to mention all the other goodies like the camera man's shadow popping up in shots, editing that seems to be done by a 7 year old on acid and some dialogue so inaudible that if you turned your t.v. up to full blast, you still couldn't make it out. Well, as the narrator would say, "Right on"! I know plenty of people wouldn't understand how anyone could enjoy a movie like this and wouldn't hear of the old "so bad, it's good" excuse but, it's harmless to enjoy it for what it is... which is, the best Anti-Drug/Pro-Religion/Turkey-Monster movie ever made! The Good: The freakin' narrator, man! He's too much! He's obviously reading his lines (and probably doing his "lines") off the desk in front of him, which he tries to cover by making it look like he's just looking down and collecting his thoughts or something. If your in the mood, you'll probably laugh your ass off during this flick.The Not So Good: If your not in the mood for it, this movie will probably seem like the worst thing ever caught on film. Acting is so below the bottom of the barrel, it's really not easy to describe.However, if you were expecting anything else, shame on you.

A buff, but gentlemanly, biker rides into the life of two sisters, one a Born-Again Christian, the other a heavy partyer who enjoys smoking pot and having a good time. Thanks to some kind support from his Christian pal, an employer at a poultry farm gives him a job. Hershell(Steve Hawkes, who also co-wrote, co-produced and co-directed)agrees to eat experimented turkey(?!)and suffers such an illness it causes him to fall unconscious. Before taking the job, he fell under the spell of the care-free sister, smoking some pot with her which re-awakened a habit he suffered in Vietnam after an arm injury. Coupled with the experimental meat, it seems Herschell is effected drastically..he grows a turkey head! Any woman in the surrounding area other than the two girls Herschell cares for are victims for his blood thirst. Often victims are hung upside down, their necks cut with blood pouring into the beaked fiend's human hands. What will Herschell do? How can he control his craving for blood?Simply dreadful in every conceivable fashion. I could not find one single aspect of worth throughout the entire painful experience. It's clearly visualized that those responsible for this abomination had no reason to ever make a film in the first place. Those involved should've cut their losses and forgot about ever making this inept travesty. The camera work is simply putrid as is the editing. Some narrator smoking a cigarette is reading off some pamphlet about change or behavior, which really could've wisely(..if any wisdom whatsoever was used during the entire process of this thing's production)been left on the cutting room floor and is merely intrusive(..which, if it were any good, would be a welcome interruption from this vile pile of garbage)bothering us with opinions that irritate instead of enlighten. The beaked, feathered bird head is a laughing stock. It is the icing on the cake and will certainly appeal to those who enjoy the worst kind of films possible. The acting is brought to us by a gathering of the directors' friends, I guess, and they all look about as interested as I was during this whole abysmal experience. The attacks on women are about as laughable as the sawed-off leg of one drug pusher with blood gushing forth. Loud screams are repeated in cycle over and over the scenes of violence which bring chuckles instead of terror or repulsion. If anything brings repulsion it's the camera set ups which often shoot characters out of frame and off-focus. I don't ask for much..just shoot your actors in the center of the frame for Chrissakes! And, the actors often look off as if attempting to understand when they're supposed to talk(..and perhaps seeking help with their dialogue;I'm pretty sure they could've ad-libbed and it would've been just as effective as what they had to say)and where to look. There's a legion of beloved fans for this turkey(..pun intended)and those who enjoy this junk can have it. While others find it incredibly entertaining, I found it pathetic and just plain tedious.