ARACHNOQUAKEYes... it is as bad as it sounds.This film is brilliant for comedy value. It is a B-movie with b-movie acting and b-movie effects.The film is about a lot of giant fire breathing spiders running wild killing people.The story is terrible. Nothing really makes any sense. Nothing is explained.The acting is so bad in this film, it is no wonder I have not heard of most of the cast... but there is one famous face in this. Edward Furlong... oh dear. His career has gone downhill. The thing is, he is a good actor. I obviously loved him in Terminator 2, and he also made a fantastic movie called Brainscan... But I don't know what he was thinking when he agreed to be in this. His acting is as bad as everyone elses!Also, in this movie his character is married with 2 children... his wife looks old enough to be him Mum and his 2 kids look old. I mean, it looks like he had these 2 kids when he was 8 years old! I can't help but think that casting was not very good.There was some brilliant comedy moments in this. If you like movies that doesn't really take itself too seriously, then you will love this.I really enjoyed it, but only because it had me laughing at it from beginning to end.I will give this film 5 out of 10.But it only gets that rating because I have not laughed that much for a long time.For more reviews, please like my Facebook page:https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ordinary-Person-Movie- Reviews/456572047728204?ref=hl

Another entry in the trash of SyFy flicks. I only gave it a shot because Edward Furlong was in it, you know, the young dude from Terminator 2 (1991). From the beginning the spiders are on-screen and that was rather okay because the action came in from the beginning. But on the other hand it looked ridiculous due the CGI used.In the beginning the spiders are rather small and believable but once they are throwing fire (CGI) towards humans it becomes laughable. After that the spiders become bigger and bigger and it all ends with a King Kong situation.The story if there was any was stupid and the acting wasn't convincing at all. If you pop up a beer with friends then you will laugh a lot but further this doesn't give us anything at all.Gore 0/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 1/5 Story 1/5 Comedy 0/5

The fact that this movie even made it on SyFy, lowers the credibility of the entire network. I look at SyFy as a channel that plays the worst low budget films in the world. This one is truly the worst, seeing as how they almost never shoot the guns or even try to when the spiders come up to them. And is the only way for people to die by tripping over a branch? The old bald man that apparently was injured, actually tripped on a tree branch.. Get over it. Pathetic movie. Low budget films can clearly convey a message with decent graphics and actions, such as that Islamist film that created a huge buzz in the middle east. But this piece of crap only gets the honor to be shown on Syfy.

Unfortunately the market for monstrous spider movies is flooded with less than average movies, and only a handful of the movies of this genre actually managed to pull it off decently. "Arachnoquake" is in the lower scale of the genre, that, of course, being not-so-good end, as you might have guessed.The movie is a SyFy Channel movie, which pretty much sets the bar for expectations. But "Arachnoquake" does deliver what has become the trademark quality of SyFy Channel; that being cheesy effects, campy storyline and mindless entertainment that will actually have you laughing or smiling in disbelief.An earthquake strikes New Orleans, causing cracks in the ground to open up. But as if earthquakes in this region wasn't strange enough, then the cracks in the ground opened up to subterranean spiders who emerge to prey on the people of New Orleans. These subterranean spiders that no one ever have seen or heard of range in the size from a human fist to actually larger than a school bus. The bayou is in dire threat now from the lurkers of beneath.That being the storyline, well it is pretty much straight forward textbook approach; natural disaster awakens slumbering beasts, beasts emerge to prey on humans in the area, humans are terrified but manage to fight back (and win, of course) against these unnatural predators. It is as in every other spider movie available. And of course you have the fairly stereotypical character gallery in "Arachnoquake" as well.As for the acting in "Arachnoquake", well it was actually good enough. Sure, don't expect award-winning performances here, but in overall, then I think the actors and actresses actually did well enough, as what I had expected from it, being a SyFy Channel movie and all.The effects, well of that I am somewhat swaying in my opinions. Because in some scenes the spiders actually looked nice enough, despite their pinkish-white color, but then in other scenes it just went to awful CGI effects. But if you are familiar with SyFy Channels previous work (well most of it anyway) then you know what level of effects you are in for in this movie.The movie give the expression that this spider infestation happened all over New Orleans, but the movie didn't manage to pull that off. The movie never managed to make it seem like the entire city was in dire peril, or that the citizens were terrified. And when the spider queen was killed, all other spiders just died as well. Wait, what? So they died in sympathy? Never heard about that before, so you kill the queen, and automatically all spiders in the nest drop over dead from sorrow or shock? That was just hilarious.One thing that made me crack out laughing was when the spiders started breathing fire. So monstrously large subterranean spiders wasn't enough? No, apparently some writer somewhere thought 'oh yeah, it would be so much better if the spiders breathe fire as well'. Right. Well that just made the movie even more cheesy than it already was.I think that Ethan Phillips character Roy's death scene was hilarious. I am not spoiling it more by saying how he dies (having said he died is spoiling it enough), but pay attention to the billowing steamy breath from his mouth, showing that he is obviously still alive and breathing, when he just have died. Hooray for the weather there, eh? How could the people behind the camera or the fellow actors around that not see it and point it out? Or did the movie maker just go 'and that's a wrap, no one will notice his steamy breath anyway'? It always makes me curl up my toes in disbelief when there are mistakes like this in movies.But entertainment wise, then "Arachnoquake" is actually fun to watch. Why? Well because it is just that cheesy and campy, and because you know exactly how the movie will turn out, even before the first scene starts rolling. But unfortunately, this wasn't one of SyFy Channels better movies, nor did it manage to carve itself out from some of the more outstanding spider movies of the same genre, and thus it just becomes a less than mediocre experience.