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Trailer Synopsis Cast Keywords

A farce satirizing extraterrestrial horror movies such as Alien. Alternate titles include "The Creature Wasn't Nice" and "Naked Space" (1999 re-release trying to capitalize on Nielsen's "Naked Gun" success).

Cindy Williams as  Annie McHugh
Bruce Kimmel as  John
Leslie Nielsen as  Capt. Jamieson
Gerrit Graham as  Rodzinski
Patrick Macnee as  Dr. Stark
Paul Brinegar as  Clint Eastwood / Dirty Harry
Jed Mills as  Dirty Harry Punk #4
Broderick Crawford as  Max the Computer (voice)

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Reviews

CineMage
1983/07/01

Yes, there will be spoilers aplenty: there is no other way to examine this work and its odd failure as a movie despite its likable moments.This movie is a broad parody of the monster-aboard-a-spaceship style of movies that have been a part of SF cinema since its inception. The basic storyline is that a space-faring crew of Americans and a token British scientist encounter a strange new world, where they find a finger-sized "bit of goo" that seems able to choose who it likes. These are just people doing a job that involves space travel, not space explorers, but nevertheless they take the goo aboard their ship, and once there, the goo grows into a cyclopean humanoid monster. Halfway through the movie, the monster sings (and dances) that it wants to eat them. From that point on, the storyline becomes predictable as crewmembers become monster chow until the two youngest crewmembers manage to eject the monster into space.A person wants so much to like this movie that it's hard not to wonder what went wrong. The costumes and sets would have worked well in a serious SF television series. The painted sets are almost archetypically 1960s Sci Fi. When the script works, it works despite being G-rated in its humor, a rare feat these days. The actors bring non sequitur moments of dignity, glimpsed just here and there beneath the surface, though those moments of dignity clash with the parody that the movie tries so hard to be.In many ways it looks as though the author had been intending an absurdist work, a sort of Ionesco or Beckett theatre of the absurd set in outer space, then tried to make it marketable by disguising it as the usual parody with goofy shtick and talented comedic actors. On the other hand, this movie also looks like a cinematic fan-fic that the actors all played out as a favor to writer Bruce Kimmel, somehow shining in their individual moments despite the poor editing and flaccid plot (the actors often appear to be enjoying themselves rather than worrying about creating a movie).Oddly, the best lines and comedic set pieces go to the least famous stars, Cindy Williams and Bruce Kimmel, while celebrated old hands Leslie Nielsen, Gerrit Graham, and Patrick Macnee end up dying at the hands of the creature. It's a little bit like the tactic used in, for example, the first Harry Potter film, in which the several unknown child stars in that film were surrounded by brilliant actors who helped make them look good (although Cindy Williams and Bruce Kimmel are far from unknown).Williams demonstrates impressive comedic timing in her role as the Ignored Voice of Reason; for a good example of such timing, look at the gag when she screams an absurdly long scream or when she patiently (and, of course, unsuccessfully) tries to explain to the resident scientist that the monster had just finished a lounge act about how much it wants to eat all of them. But the script and editing never allow her likable moments on-screen to cohere into an actual character.Kimmel is adorable as the clumsy, nervous Space Cadet; there's nothing particularly original or hilarious about his shtick as crew cook, crew monster bait, and crew sad sack, but he excels at the puppy dog role so well it's hard not to want to give his character a hug.However, it becomes noticeable that, as the writer, Kimmel has made his character the hero in lieu of the more experienced actors around him: his character finds the goo (which likes him), faces the monster on his own with a brief comedic monologue, defeats the monster alongside Williams' character, and finds himself praised repeatedly by the lone female character throughout the film, who spends an inordinate amount of time with her arm wrapped protectively around him. His character "gets the girl" -- while the characters played by Leslie Nielsen, Gerrit Graham, and Patrick Macnee get eaten. This only increases the feeling that this movie is a fan-fic for Kimmel, with pals Nielsen, Graham, and Macnee gamely playing along. (I have no idea whether Kimmel is actually pals with any of these actors.) Leslie Nielsen, Gerrit Graham, and Patrick Macnee give their usual talented performances, but their performances are oddly laid back for a comedy movie: it's never quite clear whether they are playing this as a comedy or as a comedic drama. Nielsen's character has more in common with his serious-minded Commander Adams from Forbidden Planet (albeit more snarky) than he does with any of the characters Nielsen has played in recent years. (For example, there is a scene where Nielsen's character is apparently intended to be perversely glancing down Williams' neckline, but the way Nielsen plays it, it looks far more as though he is gazing down with fatherly affection on Williams and Kimmel as the frightened Designated Couple cling to each other.) Graham's character is clearly intended to be a parody Red Neck in Space figure, but he gives the character a certain angry dignity that is at odds with the parodic feel of the movie. Macnee always has fun with whatever role he accepts these days, but he shows his usual talented comedic timing even with jokes that the movie never seems to take anywhere once he's finished with them.I would rate this movie a '9' for potential that peeps out from every corner of the movie and for the actors all bringing far more to the script than it merits, and a '4' for its failure at utilizing any of that potential, rounding to a '6' because it's just not good enough for a '7'. The only way to enjoy this work is to treat it as a group of amusing and likable set pieces and not a movie at all.

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rooprect
1983/07/02

You'd think a movie made in 1983 right on the heels of "Airplane!" and starring Airplane's own master of deadpan Leslie Nielsen, as well as Cindy Williams (Shirley from "Laverne & Shirley") and Patrick MacNee (whom I'll always think of as Sir Denis Eaton-Hogg from "Spinal Tap") would be a sleeper hit. Well, parts may put you to sleep, but other parts are definitely a hit. In the end I think "Naked Space" aka "Spaceship" aka "The Creature Wasn't Nice" is well worth the ride.It should be noted that writer/director Bruce Kimmel never intended this comedy to be in the style of the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker films "Airplane!" and "Naked Gun", but they were marketed as such, and, according to Kimmel's liner notes on the soundtrack, the film was edited by someone else without his approval. I think Kimmel's style was intended to be something closer to Mel Brooks' early work "12 Chairs", "The Producers", not nearly as zany & absurd as you've been led to believe by the marketing. But if you take it all in stride, a fun time will be had by all."Naked Space" has a very low budget look which works in its favor. Most of the gags are pretty tame (the film is rated PG, almost G if not for some brief hilarious gore), and often you may find yourself waiting for a punchline that never comes. If you are expecting Airplane-esque hilarity, you may be disappointed. But the money shot, which even haters of this film must admit is pretty great, comes in the 2nd half when we get a moment of sheer Mel Brooksian gold. That's all I'll say because it's best left as a surprise. But if you don't mind a mild spo!ler, go to YouTube and search "I want to eat your face".The 2nd great moment comes near the end of the film. If nothing else, watch the movie for those 2 scenes, watch it to see a rare assemblage of great 70s- 80s actors, or watch it to kill 91 minutes of your life. The hilarious songs, as well as the movie, were written by director Bruce Kimmel who also co-stars as "John Boy".

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MTGrizzly
1983/07/03

Okay, so I like really bizarre movies and am a big fan of Cindy Williams, but come on - this movie is not without it's merits. You have a great cast, a so so story, great music, interesting creatures and really bad special effects. What else could you want? I mean the movie wasn't supposed to be serious or even at the level of the ridiculous movies Neilson later made, like Smoking Gun...Obviously this movie is an acquired taste. As far as quality, what should one expect from a movie produced by the "North Orange County Community College"? Star Wars? (I think that Star Wars would have been a lot better, if they had cast Cindy Williams as Princess Leia...)

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PDragon616
1983/07/04

The WORST movie ever? Get real. Check out Manos the Hands of Fate. Better yet check out Savage Instinct by Troma Pictures. THEN you will have seen the face of truly awful.Yes The Creature Wasn't Nice is indeed painfully bad, much of the humor is flat and the plot hangs together like cottage cheese. But it also has redeeming features. The irreverent character Rodzinski is good for yucks, as is the insane Doctor Stark is over the top with his goofball lines. "What are they going to call it? The JOHN organism? It's MINE!" I agree parts of the movie are gallingly bad, but get past them, and there are moments of merit here and there. It ain't Shakespeare but there are times when it is just what I need.

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